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Post by Gareth of Marice on Apr 9, 2006 13:59:15 GMT -5
I know there are a lot of people on here older than me, and I just wish to know. I think I'd get a better response from the females on here, so I'm just going to put the question in a format for asking a female.
Okay, if you are Catholic married woman with two sons, and one of them is 13, and he just bought Brokeback Mountain, would you let him keep it?
This relates to me in the fact that I bought the movie but my parents wished to throw it away. My dad was buying a DVD player, and he allowed me to buy a movie, so I chose Brokeback Mountain. He didn't take a look at it or anything, so of course he didn't recognize it. When I got home, I hid it upstairs in my room, because I knew that if either of my parents found it, it'd be burned or thrown away.
Well, my mom comes up to my room and sees the movie. She takes it, and as I try to snatch it back, she suddenly answers with, "Is this that movie about those two guys that fall in love?" I responded with a nod, but continued to try to take it away. She asked me where I got it, and I told her a friend of mine let me borrow it. She asked me why I wanted to watch it, and I didn't asnwer and just told her that it was my movie. She walked off in a disappoined way, and later in the day she asked me why I was buying such filth.
The next day when I see her, she asks me, "Hey, lend me that movie about those two faggots." You should have seen my face at that moment. I get really mad when the movie is mocked, and especially at my friends, and when my mom said that, I controlled my temper and just said, "Sure."
Well that night I put it on the DVD player and I started to watch it with my parents. What was funny was they didn't say anything during the sex scene. My parents were assuming that it was because they were drunk, but when Ennis goes into the tent with Jack the second night and they just kiss, my mom said how disgusted she was by the movie, and my dad couldn't believe that he had paid for such "garbage". Then my mom clearly stated that she would not let me keep the movie. She said that I had watched it without their consent already, so I had already seen the movie, but that she wasn't letting me keep it. I was trying to explain to her that it was mearly art and that it wouldn't affect me in any way because I was mature enough to handle it. She said a 13 year old boy should not be watching that kind of rubbish, and said she'd throw it away.
Was that right? I mean, I think I'm mature enough to understand what's going on in the movie and everything. Or were they right in trying to protect from just another mere detail of the real world?
(In the end, I snuck downstairs, stole my movie back, and am currently hiding it in my room until a later date in which my parents might actually consider me mature.)
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Post by Kelley on Apr 9, 2006 14:20:38 GMT -5
Oh my goodness. Okay... wow where to I begin to say? I think at 13 you can certainly be mature enough to understand and appreciate the film. I mean, Disney films since before time have been about love... and granted BBM is between two men, it is no different in regards to the love that they feel for one another. That is no hard concept to grasp. I do realize where your parents are coming from. As my father was the same way at first. My mum was not keen on going to see it in theatre either, but I was persistant that it was fabulous and once she saw it she completely agreed, it was my father that still does not quite understand it... though he saw it because he knows I love it. He was not exactly thrilled when I bought it, but he also knew that there was no stopping me I had TONS of explaining to do... and he has finally come around to it. My entire family also knows better than to make any rude remarks about gay/homosexual/bisexual around me. (Casts are great weapons! ) I do not know if this has answered anything for you... But No I do not think age = maturity or lack of age = immaturity
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Post by rafael83 on Apr 9, 2006 15:10:30 GMT -5
The best way to make them understand why you want to keep this movie is talking with them. Explain them why you love the movie, that the story is about love, and not 2 gay guys...
I don't really know what are the reactions of a Catholic family, but it cannot be such an excessive thing?
My parents haven't seen the movie, but I'm sure they will do it when it will be out in France. They are very tolerant. When they were younger, before my birth, they shared an apartment with one of our gay friend, and they tell me sometimes some stories... It's so funny!!
Well! I think the same as Kelley, that's not the age which make maturity!
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Post by xzcarlyzx on Apr 9, 2006 18:41:33 GMT -5
I am also thirteen. What a drag. But anyway. My mom said I cannot get it for if I do my dad might watch it and we both will get in trouble. Now I went to the movie with her and she did not care for it. She didn't cry(AMAZING!) I think if my dad wasn't around that I would be allowed to buy the movie. my friend Caitlin is buying it for me when I have my birthday party in June and is going to say she didn't know I wasn' allowed to buy it. That is the way to go. Lol.
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robb
Newbie
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Post by robb on Apr 9, 2006 18:54:05 GMT -5
That sounds like the way to go. But waiting until June may be hard.
As for the question, no I do not find youth to equal maturity. I could say yes my sister is immature, but that would probably be the biggest crock of shit of the century. I am amazed by her at 16, I had not figured all out what she has. So definitely not! Though as her older brother I could say "of course" it would be a blatant lie!
As for the Catholic stand point... I am not sure how different people are in their religion or how the Bible is interpreted. Our family has religion but are still very open to the power of this film.
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Post by Gareth of Marice on Apr 10, 2006 7:42:43 GMT -5
Thanks guys. It really does help to see that some people agree with me.
Besides, I'm going to respect my parents wishes. I'm not going to throw the movie away, because that would be going against what I want. If I hide the movie until I'm like 15, maybe I could be considered "mature" enough then. I get to keep the movie for what I want, and my parents get their limit of maturity. Would that equal peace?
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Post by freezzze on Apr 10, 2006 8:56:17 GMT -5
It sucks you've gotta hide it ... I don't think you can be immature to a story about love. I have no idea how your parents are but something different, like "gay movies", isn't necessarily wrong or bad. My parents let me watch 16+ movies when I was 11 or so
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koka
Connaissance
I'm BEAUTIFULLY BROKEN!
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Post by koka on Apr 10, 2006 8:59:03 GMT -5
oh god! I'm...speechless. I'm glad I can't realte to what you're going through 'cause it sounds like hell. I remember first telling my mom about the movie- she was happy for me because I was happy and excited about it ( that was august 2004 ) and then when the movie finally came to our theaters, she went to see it with me ( my 6th viewing may I add....I've seen it 8 times in the theater so far ) because all of the great reviews the movie got and she was totally blown away. she got the message- the message is love. and it seems to me that you got it too. so don't you DARE listen to your parents. I don't want to be mean or anything, but they know shit. you're old enough to make your OWN DECISIONS AND CHOICES. and your choice was to allow yourself the experience of such a terrific, mind blowing and beautiful film that aims straight for the heart. your parent's didn't want to give the movie a chance because of their own prejudice. and that's fine, that's their choice- they decided they don't want to allow themselves to see what true, everlasting love looks likes. and that's completelly okay. but what's NOT okay is for them to FORBID you for wanting to see that. I know I'm not supposed to tell you what to do and I know we are in fact to completelly different people, but if I were you, I would make a stand! you know, stand up to your folks, tell them that the movies is NOT trash, that it's an amazing DRAMA, that they HAVE NO RIGHT TO JUDGE SOMETHING THEY DIDN'T EVEN SEE and that they should be happy to have such a TOLERANT and INTELLIGENT son who understands the true meaning of LOVE at such a young age!!!! mind you, some people who are over 40 AREN'T MATURE enough to see this movie because there are some things in life they just didn't have the chance to experience....and yet there are some 13 year olds ( you being on of them ) who have the capacity to completelly and utterly understand the movie on a very deep, very emotional level. my mom told me, after seeing BBM, 'this was such a beautiful film. but you know what? you will TRULLY come to understand the movie when you're over 40.' and I asked why, although I already knew the answer. she said: 'because of life experience' and I didn't argue with her, I just thought: 'Oh mom, if you only knew how much I REALLY understand this movie.' she knows I'm mature and everything, but she still underestimates my ability to understand some life altering situations because I haven't experienced them yet. but as I said, that's what she thinks
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Post by Gareth of Marice on Apr 10, 2006 20:45:11 GMT -5
oh god! I'm...speechless. I'm glad I can't realte to what you're going through 'cause it sounds like hell. I remember first telling my mom about the movie- she was happy for me because I was happy and excited about it ( that was august 2004 ) and then when the movie finally came to our theaters, she went to see it with me ( my 6th viewing may I add....I've seen it 8 times in the theater so far ) because all of the great reviews the movie got and she was totally blown away. she got the message- the message is love. and it seems to me that you got it too. so don't you DARE listen to your parents. I don't want to be mean or anything, but they know shit. you're old enough to make your OWN DECISIONS AND CHOICES. and your choice was to allow yourself the experience of such a terrific, mind blowing and beautiful film that aims straight for the heart. your parent's didn't want to give the movie a chance because of their own prejudice. and that's fine, that's their choice- they decided they don't want to allow themselves to see what true, everlasting love looks likes. and that's completelly okay. but what's NOT okay is for them to FORBID you for wanting to see that. I know I'm not supposed to tell you what to do and I know we are in fact to completelly different people, but if I were you, I would make a stand! you know, stand up to your folks, tell them that the movies is NOT trash, that it's an amazing DRAMA, that they HAVE NO RIGHT TO JUDGE SOMETHING THEY DIDN'T EVEN SEE and that they should be happy to have such a TOLERANT and INTELLIGENT son who understands the true meaning of LOVE at such a young age!!!! mind you, some people who are over 40 AREN'T MATURE enough to see this movie because there are some things in life they just didn't have the chance to experience....and yet there are some 13 year olds ( you being on of them ) who have the capacity to completelly and utterly understand the movie on a very deep, very emotional level. my mom told me, after seeing BBM, 'this was such a beautiful film. but you know what? you will TRULLY come to understand the movie when you're over 40.' and I asked why, although I already knew the answer. she said: 'because of life experience' and I didn't argue with her, I just thought: 'Oh mom, if you only knew how much I REALLY understand this movie.' she knows I'm mature and everything, but she still underestimates my ability to understand some life altering situations because I haven't experienced them yet. but as I said, that's what she thinks You have made my day! Thank you, but I can't stand up to my parents. It's not the way I was raised. I have a lot of respect towards them, but everything you said seemed so just and right. I won't say anything to them at the risk of losing the movie, but thank you! You have inspired me. :-D. For that, you get a kiss.
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Post by ragnar84 on Apr 11, 2006 8:52:42 GMT -5
I agree with Koka. At 13 you have demonstrated far more maturity than your parents. The only reason they don't want you to see that type of "filth" is because they're terrified you'll turn gay just by watching it, or be morally corrupted in some way. Typical wrong-headed bollocks. It's not like you're watching Hellraiser, or some sick gore-fest ('The Passion' springs to mind). How old do you have to be to see an "R" rated movie? In the UK it's 15. Hardly outrageous. It's when I hear stories like yours that I thank god I come from a family of atheists.
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Post by Kelley on Apr 11, 2006 9:06:48 GMT -5
(In the USA technically you must be 18 to watch the film in theatres, alone. However, to buy it once it is out on video it is of no consequence what age you are!)
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Post by xzcarlyzx on Apr 11, 2006 17:07:52 GMT -5
Actually Kelley you have to be 17, but hey it's only a year.
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Post by Gareth of Marice on Apr 11, 2006 19:55:08 GMT -5
Yeah the year stuff has been changed. :-D. ragnar, thanks. :-D. I wish I had parents who didn't really care so much about having me be the perfect intelligent young man and everything that has to be married, have 10 children, and be rich. It's hard. They've planned my future and everything, and like they don't want anyone to mess with it.
It's killing me inside.
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Post by jakesdream on Apr 11, 2006 23:28:14 GMT -5
As a mother (sorry no boys) I can relate to what your parents are thinking Gareth you have this child and you want so much for them. You dream so big for them you forget that it's their lives and they may have different plans and ideas for themselves. As a 'parent' I must apologize for that, but you will never know how hard it is to watch this 'baby' grow into an child and then from this innocent child into a teenager and so on. I think the world is so full of 'danger' and 'adult' stuff (sex, drugs ect) that your parents are just trying to protect you? I do think like the others here that age does not = maturaty, I mean anyone with a husband knows that (LOL JK ) As for catholic I do know that if you are a practicing Catholic and belive in the bible you would have to be against BBM. It is so plain and simple that relations of the same sex are sins, and nothing you could say or do would ever convince them (PPl that believe in the bible word for word) anything different. It's like going against God if you would say that Gay ppl are a result of God. Anyone would tell you that they (gay ppl) choose to be gay. Anyway this is a HUGE topic and I might be straying from the origial point (sorry I tend to do that with my age LOL) Anyway Gareth in the end I think your parents are just 'worried' about why you want this movie or even would like it. I mean face it a lot of guys (unless they are gay) would not out rightly say that they like this movie. You are just WAY more mature than your parents probably give you credit for. You should feel very proud of yourself that you see beyond the 'surface' of this movie and can see into the depths of it. You just have to wait for your parents to catch up to YOU They will come around. I really admire your loyalty to them and respect them, I can only hope my kids are like you Jd
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koka
Connaissance
I'm BEAUTIFULLY BROKEN!
Posts: 147
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Post by koka on Apr 12, 2006 10:51:25 GMT -5
As a mother (sorry no boys) I can relate to what your parents are thinking Gareth As for catholic I do know that if you are a practicing Catholic and belive in the bible you would have to be against BBM. It is so plain and simple that relations of the same sex are sins, and nothing you could say or do would ever convince them (PPl that believe in the bible word for word) anything different. It's like going against God if you would say that Gay ppl are a result of God. Anyone would tell you that they (gay ppl) choose to be gay. I get what you're saying. well, I myself do not believe in the Bible nor do I believe in God ( I'm gonna correct myself- I believe in 'God'- to me, God is absolut love ) but if you ask me, the Bible is the most hypocritical load of crap ever written. 'God' and Jesus say we should love&respect others as we do ourselfs does it not? so what, that applies to all people....oh yeah, except GAY people? give me a break!
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